yes, it is only 3:30. yes, i've already eaten my late lunch/early dinner. and yes, i may be headed to bed soon. my headache is still here, my stomach is upset and i want this day to end.
i had an anxious day yesterday in anticipation of today: i had both my first DAR meeting this morning and a scripture reading (john 1:1-4:42) in front of my church congregation (also streaming live) at 1:00. i made it through both of those without my anxiety bothering me but now i'm as exhausted as if i had chaired the meeting and written the scripture.
it's so hard to do things that once would have been easy. when they asked me to say a little bit about myself at the DAR meeting this morning i couldn't think of a thing to say. i just feel as if i'm going through the motions of this life and that i have nothing left and that i am a shell of my former self. i managed the requisite, "i was born in raised in nashville, my family has been in tennessee for at least 8 generations, i went to lipscomb, i work at rhino books" and then...nothing. i don't feel like i have anything to say to "normal" (meaning non-flood victims) people anymore.
i think maybe winston and i will pile up in bed and turn on a movie, it doesn't really matter what. he's still feeling the aftereffects of his BATH yesterday--meaning he's as exhausted as i am.
grace and peace
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