Saturday, June 27, 2020

a dreaded day

today is the day i've dreaded for days, weeks, months:  the day i had to move the contents of my office to a storage unit.  the bookstore is almost completely empty now.  i have 3 days left on the lease and i'll have to work part of all 3 of those days to get everything done in time.  i was blessed today with helpers (in fact, i had more than enough) but i still felt like i was alone.


the problem with not having a business partner, an investor, even a husband, is that i have to suffer these kinds of things - the big stuff - all alone.  no matter how many people show up on a day like today, i still have to face it all on my own.  i have to sit with all my decisions and all my sadness alone.  


(full disclosure:  my brother just called to check on me - he helped today.  full, full disclosure:  i prefer to be alone - i don't mourn that decision.)  


anyway, i'm beyond tired and sad.  i just want to pile up in bed with my pug and my book and not think for a while.  


grace and peace. 

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