i wish i'd slept more than 3 hours last night;
i wish i'd had the energy and ability to go to church this morning;
i wish i had the energy for a long walk;
i wish this house weren't such a wreck;
i wish i had the energy and motivation to actually clean said house;
i wish i didn't have to do the dishes before i can cook supper tonight;
i wish someone else would cook supper tonight;
i wish i would force myself to write;
i wish i could stare at the wall all day and do nothing;
in lieu of that:
i wish i could read my book and listen to records all day.
you catch my drift.
i don't want to do anything responsible and hygienic. i just want to be a slug and sit in this filth.
anxiety is HIGH and i hurt all over. i'll just have to make a list and tackle one. small. thing. at. a. time. i can't bear the house the way it is one more day. i don't know about y'all but if weren't for music i would never be able to clean anything!
grace and peace