it happened today. my football team lost and we are not eligible for a bowl game. that means that my college football season is over...in november! it's awful. as little southern girls we are taught to love and/or revere certain things, they are:
1. our daddies;
2. Jesus;
3. our college football colors, mascot and coach;
4. the make of car our daddies drive; and
5. robert e. lee.
i grew up knowing that i would drive a ford (and i did--a baby blue mustang convertible) until we, as a family, switched to nissan. i also grew up wearing orange every saturday from august-new years as those were the months that correspond with the university of tennessee volunteers football schedule. i have untold amounts of orange clothing (and no one really looks good in orange!) pre-flood i had at least a half dozen bottles of orange toenail polish (those too are orange for fall.) i now only have one bottle of orange polish (bought for me by daddy shortly after the flood.)
i was food and familied out after the thanksgiving celebrations so i stayed home to watch the game on-line. it was horrible. i will never know if they could have pulled it out (we only lost by 3 points) had i driven across town to watch with the family! we sports fans are a superstitious lot.
my maternal grandmother is on her way to the hospital tonight with a high fever. i'm worried about her and am waiting to hear some news. my mono continues to hang on. it was a beautiful day here today and we spent a good deal of time outside--rain and cold are expected tomorrow.
my anxiety hasn't been too bad today. at least until the sun went down and i started my hunt for the moon. it's very cloudy now so there's no hope of seeing it tonight but the last 2 nights it's been relatively clear yet i have been unable to spot it. i know nothing about the phases of the moon, i pay little to no attention to its location, but i have begun to be paranoid about its conspicuous absence since thursday night. it was clear and i could see innumerable stars (rare this close to downtown) but the moon was MIA. i haven't seen it since and am feeling a little uneasy about it.
there is no limit to the wild, irrational thoughts to which i am prone these days. i feel as if the earth itself has slipped from its orbit and i am the only one who knows it.
grace and peace
Maybe the moon was stolen? I noticed it missing. However, I did just assume that it was due to the phases. On that note, I spotted Orion's belt and was sure that I should be part of any new space program!
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